FINALLY

Today we ended up having the most productive session with rachel to date, but it was also balanced by an equally productive session with Mr Wonka yesterday.

Yesterday Mr wonka met a very cross alter (see below) now what surprised me wasnt that she was cross but it was that she shared at all. There are some alters who have never shared with anyone and she was one of them, but then again why would she share when she hasnt been this worried before. So today was a follow on of sorts. I decided to read out the blog below and start from there to see if we could nut through what might be going on.

Now bare in mind a week before i talked to rachel about mon still having an influence in our life, but what i had noticed was that as the week has gone on since sharing with rachel the pressure from what had been bothering me about mon had considerably lessened. So today when w got to rachels i knew a shift internally had taken place. So the story goes as follows. It seems our latest spree of people through home have terribly unsettled the littles which in turn was and has been affecting us protectors in one form or another.

The littles afraid that if their house becomes a mess or noisy the cult will find them and the terror will start all over again. They equate quiet with safety and noise and people with exposure. One alter saying that when she hears the children's feet on the stairs running up down up down she starts remembering stuff and when its quiet she isnt so scared. They also equate the mess that is left by visitors with the mess that people left where we used to live which then worries them that the same mess means the cult has returned here. And finally the one who wrote and spoke yesterday and again today is cross because her things are getting touched and that for her means she could get in trouble and go back to being kept in a cage.

So they have equated the quietness of the life we have been leading as the reason the cult havent found them yet, they havent equated it to our protection and life choices. But something else really good came out of this and that was that once the one who was cross stopped talking other littles broke the ice and also shared that the recent spate of people through our home scared them also, but the end of the conversation was that they said they were sick of remembering and being scared and that if rachel could help them not go back to flashbacks like mon did then they would do the work to get their head better. It has been the most positive step in years, but what i find amazing is that they recognise that what mon did to them wasnt necessary and that they spoke about Mr Wonkas teaching them about here and now and knowing they are grounded.

So rachel and i will come up on ideas that help the littles stay in the here and now and not ab react as they talk they in turn have said they do want to do the work as long as they dont get the flashbacks and if they do, for us to help them stay in the here and now just like Mr Wonka has taught them. Each session Rachel will do as she did today always have pen and pencil handy as she has done art therapy with clients before and likes doing it, we in turn will come up with some feeling things for the littles who are talking to remind them if they think they are going back in time to stay in the present. We have also extended our session time with rachel to half an hour more. This is a huge step.

In turn we continue to see Mr wonka whose teaching and talking to the system is i beleive causing the catalyst for these good steps. he is thoguhtful and provacative and this is an example of how a team approach can work quite well. We will see him once a fortnight and rachel once a week.

In turn i will limit the amount of people in my house for a while as i recognise that it is scaring them and im more than happy with solitude. So for now the lunches and dinner parties will stop at least until those littles get to understand more about here and now. And im happy to do that because this is huge progress and as they say in Muriels Wedding "you cant stop progress".

if anyone has any good ideas that have helped them in therapy stay grounded it would be great to get some ideas..


sa'de